I write to keep things so that one day others may find guidance from the steps, trips, face plants, and pointing to Christ from a young man who is still taking baby steps in areas in his life, and not afraid to admit it.
I Am now in a phase of rebuilding this blog site, because God finally started to rebuild me... Yes I am a little bitter about the past 2 years, and why I went through so much brokenness- but my soul is forever excited and better prepared than it has ever been.
You may want me to explain why this personal 'rebuilding' needed to happen in the first place, why my walls are broken down, why my empire has fallen, and what underground fortresses have been gutted out. This rebuilding process is not to make my empire better, but His kingdom in me established. I now find more value in His kingdom than my empire, and want nothing more than the remnant of my selfishness to die to His grace and forgiveness.
I cant recall to you the emotional hell I have gone through, because it would only serve to highlight where I was, not focusing on the end of it's good work, but only the soul tearing, weeping, and sobs in the night. God has shown me what a real friend is, what authority is, and I'm not afraid to walk to the edges of who I am and rebuild what satan destroyed, where he gets in my mind, where my weaknesses exist, where no one wants to go... I find Gods faithfulness when I stand up and ask for help rebuilding what was once lostIf you have ever gone through a time of being upset at anyone else, you will know that it's painful to feel whatever pain someone has done to you- but I will tell you, there is a nugget of Joy and happiness right around the corner IF you are willing to go to that person, and specifically repent for what error YOU may have done... In doing this- you just decided to rebuild the wall in your own life, and chances are, you didn't want to do it... you probably felt justified to hold onto anger at the person, but it's not the other person that is in chains- it's you.
